Doors

When I pray for clarity, wanting God to shed light on a certain subject matter, I'm begging him to give a black and white answer. But sometimes I forget what exactly black and white entails. God could open the door wide open, making it obvious for me to step inside. But if he were to slam the door shut in my face, that is also a black and white answer. When God says no, he is being just as faithful to respond to my prayers. It's a funny thought, but for me it's hard to wrap my mind around.
Take today for example. I've been praying for a few weeks about whether or not I should stay longer in France. I had no idea if it was him calling me to actually stay longer, or if he was just testing my heart's willingness to obey in the event that he did ask me to stay. So I asked him to make it obvious what the next step was. And he did.
I visited the Prefecture's office today and they took one look at my visa and explained to me that I was given a "special" visa. My special visa does not allow for any prolongation and absolutely no exception can be made. I have to leave France before it expires and I cannot reenter France until I go back to the US and reapply for another titre de sejour.
So that's that. God slammed that door shut. Praise the Lord. Because the truth is he was faithful to answer me- when I asked for a black and white answer, he responded with just that!
And while I am left confused and feeling small, I have that sense of peace that supersedes my understanding.